Holy Sugar Water

Her holy sugar water use to be so sweet

Pure and gentle touches use to be so deep

Her vibe was so live and her stride was upright

Self esteem was so high with a smile so bright

I came face to face with her daily, in assurance of her return

Her eyes held wisdom of plenty lessons to learn

She gained knowledge from the streets, a few books, and the Heavens above

She maintained the strength  needed whenever push came to shove

Her holy sugar water use to be so sweet

Until the day she joined with the body she thought was just as deep

Holy hell and bittersweetness is what the two became

Warm and cold souls intertwined became category five hurricanes

Devastating aftermath is what she was left with to face

She thought she would never be the same again... but then came Amazing Grace

It surrounded her atmosphere and filtered all the debris

It brought mercy and favor along to help set her currents free

Her stone cold heart was revived as royal blood flowed through

She did away with the old and replaced it with all things new

New mentality, new ambition, new outlook on life

Now she never settles, speaks only once, and takes her time to think twice

She traded in what she wanted in exchange for the need of God’s will

She armors up with warfare prayers in the midst of the battlefield

Her holy sugar water use to be so sweet

Now her power is too sour for the minds that are weak

The blind cannot seem to hear her, and the deaf will never see

Their disabilities multiply when trying to comprehend that holy sugar water is me.

Personal Perspective

Misused, abused, loyalty taken for granted

Leading a life below my worth... the fairy tale is far from enchanted

Surrounded by blood sucking leaches that pretend to love

Quick to put the blade to my back whenever push comes to shove

I pray to God to send me His people before I fall victim to retaliation

Trying my best to be patient while feeling pressed for time in my spiritual dedication

The Bible says to do away with bitterness, anger and wrath

It is easier said than done because of the enemies in my path

It also tells me to be kind and forgiving as Christ forgave me

I have tried that method all my life... the result only reveals captivity

Ball and chain to the game of life with fake friends and even more foes

I have to keep myself reminded of the fact that I am anointed from my head to my toes

No one to overstand my point of view or relate to my perception

All alone in every decision, tired of explaining myself due to misconception

Blessed with the curse of a mind ahead of my time

Speaking truth to lost souls is like committing the ultimate crime

Never feeling as free as I should... I have to figure out the remedy

The impression of life is like a virus and the pain I fight to acknowledge is trying to consume my life like a tragedy

The path purposed for my victory has lead to a fork in the road

Chaotic twist and turns cause my fuel to burn faster without cruise control

Days filled with tension and nights accompanied by loneliness

I practice staying to myself to keep my hands free of the blood that comes from putting souls to rest

The tests are intense, but He told me the reward would be great

Sending shout outs to the ones that hold my name close to their heart as they hate

Anticipating my demise after the purpose is fulfilled

My soul could use some rest after the life I have lived

My solo prayers are trying to fight multiple wishes against me in the atmosphere

The need for salvation and protection from my enemy is severe

Lord keep me in the hollow of your hand because the evil one is trying to pluck me out

Keep Your hand on my life and blessed assurance in my heart without any doubt

I never question your works, nor do I give in to the thoughts of my flesh

Take these things into consideration as You take this weight off of my chest

Matter's Element

Complexity in a brown skinned complexion,

So deep, so pure, filled with light and lesson

I’m on a deep journey with long ventures… where do I begin?

Dealing with stored knowledge from the beginning without an end

Truth speaks clearly through “Matter’s” enlightenment,

The challenges in conversing are always relevant

Fact without belief is what “Matter” seeks,

Gaining the power of REALNESS… “Matter” is so beautifully deep

Like organic concrete… of life

A solid foundation that holds all balance through strife

Every element of “Matter’s” being is unique

Unique in space motion where time is obsolete 

The authentic pen point that “Matter” holds

Can never avoid a heavy bleed… always black and bold

No mimic or replication to this intricate being

The alpha to common eyes is at zero… no need for believing, no chance in seeing

Through my soul’s windows I see “Matter” and I like the view

The site’s energy works in harmony… an important element of artistic value

Because mine eyes see truth in “Matter”, and through “Matter” I see me

Intertwining elements… fire, light, and water… true epiphany 

What is the “Matter”?

You, “Matter”… to me that is

I give thanks to the Most High for bringing me higher

Through the connection and discovery of my mystical matter… my Messiah

The Spirit Speaks

1. God continue to set my soul free, as I seek Your face in order to reach my destiny

2. Do NOT let the devil mess with your integrity!!! The enemy is trying to take what we stand for! If we work on clearing our hearts and minds of those things NOT of God, and put sheer focus toward walking in God's will, then is when we can't be touched!!!

3. The same rules apply to life now as it did in biblical days... when you are tired and weary, remember that God said His grace alone is sufficient! Step out in faith to achieve your dreams and press through trials knowing that you have grace and mercy

4. Know what you stand for... when u search your spirit, you find your true self

5. Let the redeemed of the Lord say so!!! Shout the victory and pass on the testimony. God is consistently setting me free!!!!!

6. Lord I love you, thank you, and praise you for your annointing, favor, grace, and precious mercy!!! They are the things that get me through each day with a smile... knowing that you still consider me as your child

7. When my energy is positive, so is my atmosphere. Women control the moon as men control the sun... Embrace ur capabilities and create balance in ur life. Take out time to separate from the world and be still. God gives us more than we realize everyday.

Another Silent Cry

(My silent cry is as loud as ever)

Stuck in an orbit of corrupt mentalities

People surround me that suffer from self destruction and fatalities

I try so hard to stay focused and avoid distraction 

The demons that play with the minds of fellow beings look for a familiar reaction

No matter how careful I try to walk through life’s valley of death

I can’t seem to avoid the shadows of lost ones that are bad for my health

Everyday has a test, every action a reaction

Every time I dedicate my heart to a loved one it turns into a fatal attraction

I rely on your light oh God to guide me through the darkness of the world

Trying to be the example Marlon trusted me to be for his little girl

So many responsibilities, such a heavy cross to bear

Thank you Lord for protecting me... the enemy can’t touch one hair

He tries to torment my mind and keep me restless

Concentration is hard to find and sometimes leaves me feeling helpless

I have to war in my own household for order and peace

I don’t ask much from ANYONE! I just want ignorance and chaos to cease

People seek the things of the world and put Your commandments on hold

I am tired of looking into the eyes of lies, tired of double tongued talkers being so bold

Deliver me Father! Keep me free of sin

I washed the blood from my hands and consider myself born again

Extend my wings to fly above the trouble of the Earth

My fist are tired from swinging, I’ve been fighting this battle since birth

Reveal my purpose as well as Your face that I seek

Help me to remain loving, humble and meek

My dying wish will always be to walk as close to Christ’s step as I can

While I reside in a living hell I will remain Your number one fan

No one else has ever loved me as real and faithful as You do!

You never held my past against me, and Your word is the only everlasting truth

You have protected me and provided even when I didn’t deserve

That’s only a few reasons why I chose You as the one to serve

In my weakest moments You showed your strength 

And to show my gratitude I will go any length

I only get to sincerely smile when I have a thought or moment with You

My life has become nothing but storms and endless lists of things to do

Feeling so alone without understanding from a single soul

My pain keeps growing deep while my heart beats echoes through it’s hole

I drop liquid prayers from my eyes almost everyday

Hoping and praying that You will rescue me from captivity some miraculous way

Assist my efforts to press on and overcome the agony of my reality

Show up! And have Your way on my behalf... continue to prove Your Holy immortality

A Weary Prayer

Mixed emotions, overwhelming pain and a weary soul

Results in worthless living and a teary pillow to hold

How can this hell on Earth be so cold?

It seems as the flames get hotter the ice of life starts to unfold

I need help Lord! But it feels like lately my prayers don’t make it to You 

I know I have grace and mercy, but there is a little more I need you to do

I study for Your classes, I try to pass all of Your test

So why don’t you grant me a breath and a blessing when you know I’m doing my best?!

The pressure is so intense! Show Your face to me as I continue to give You praise

Please don’t continue to leave me stuck in life’s daze

I try hard to fight the ways of this world 

I have put You as top priority since a little girl

What am I paying for? What do I have left to prove?

Why would You let life leave a permanent bruise?

I made my promise years ago to stay true to You

I give You thanks even when I’m so low that I don’t see the need to

Sometimes I don’t see the blessing in having this life of mine

Regardless of how I feel I will respect You until the end of time

My purpose is blurry and my will has disappeared

The rebirth after death is an anticipation, life here is becoming too severe

I shine light in the world every time I pick up the phone

But when I need a break there is no one to call on

Lend rides to so call friends and strangers to any block in town

Then I’m out of pocket on gas and maintaining the ride from breaking down

I have turned so many cheeks and humbled myself amongst the proud

Yet the dark shadows of the valley follow me through the crowd

As soon as I try to come up for air and walk upright

I get hit with multiple blows, kicks, scratches and bites

Why do the good suffer so long?

I know that You are a God of many test to make me strong

You created me to praise You, and in return I get the minimum favor

I am no where near ungrateful but I do need more from my Savior!

I try to walk by faith and not by sight

But faith’s eyes are growing weak because life’s darkness is too bright!

Yet I still hold on to the One I cannot see

Is that not worth something? Are you not proud of me?

I try to bless others through my testimony and listen out for Your voice

But it seems like You are starting to whisper and I cannot hear because of the noise...

The noise of dead souls are as loud as ever

All I can do is hope and pray that I’m worthy of the day that I live in Your kingdom forever

I need You to cry out to me as I have done to You

Prove to me that the voice I hear is pure and true

I’m tired of being used and stripped of my happiness and peace

I gain both through You, so help to make the foolishness cease!!!

The time is ticking and I need a way to prove that You can bring me out of this strife

I have been rebuking the enemy as You continue to let him touch me, and everything in my life

Reveal my purpose so that I may finish this race 

I know the people of this World won’t mourn long because the haters cannot take my place

Amen

Stone Cold Soul

My heart is bleeding cold tears 

So many types of pain I’ve tried to mend over the years

From man to man I am left with disappointment

The only thing that keeps me balanced is the reminder that I am anointed

Trials and tribulations in my path day by day

Every time I need to focus the closest to me let the devil have his way

By trying to steal my joy and intruding on my peace

It is a struggle just to be happy, all of the noise just won’t cease

I want to be left alone to have time with my thoughts and God’s presence

It seems as though that is too much to ask because people use me as reverence

My name is called on all day long and I have always had to be the one with a solution

Too many burdens upon my shoulders, feels like I need to admitted to a mental institution

God meant for marriage to be an equal partnership so why do I feel like a slave?

Trapped in the very walls I built for myself and being judged on how I behave

My husband can’t understand me and disregards the fact that I mean well

We are not equally yolked and his angry lashes feel like flames from hell

I will not die without reaching my goals and I will not resign until my purpose is met

I am focused on Gods face and His faith in me, my race has already been set

I run on empty most days because man has run out of gas for me

I see the worldly desire in their eyes so I flea from the things that I no longer want to be

I would rather live my life alone than to live a life forced into sin

My mate has no desire to seek control of the demons that live within

He won’t open up nor reach deep enough to see

The reflection of God and his full capability

I tried to hear out for God’s voice on choosing my mate

I just hope I didn’t get in the way of things when God was planning my fate

I feel like my efforts to get us on common ground always end up ignored

Sometimes it leads me to think separation is the only way to settle the score

Two separate souls with two totally different mentalities

Unaware of where our paths will lead and aware of two versions of reality

I hope that one day I will find understanding and a way to heal

In this phase of life’s cycle I just feel abandoned praying for a way to deal

Suppressing tension daily and turning one cheek after the other

Yet taking verbal abuse from ignorant mouths and my significant other

I am too strong to settle and too aware of people to be fooled

Trying to let God work a plan on my behalf because the heat in my life needs to be cooled

I rely on my prayers and faith to reach my desired goals

Depending on Gods word and comforting arms to warm my stone cold soul