A Weary Prayer

Mixed emotions, overwhelming pain and a weary soul

Results in worthless living and a teary pillow to hold

How can this hell on Earth be so cold?

It seems as the flames get hotter the ice of life starts to unfold

I need help Lord! But it feels like lately my prayers don’t make it to You 

I know I have grace and mercy, but there is a little more I need you to do

I study for Your classes, I try to pass all of Your test

So why don’t you grant me a breath and a blessing when you know I’m doing my best?!

The pressure is so intense! Show Your face to me as I continue to give You praise

Please don’t continue to leave me stuck in life’s daze

I try hard to fight the ways of this world 

I have put You as top priority since a little girl

What am I paying for? What do I have left to prove?

Why would You let life leave a permanent bruise?

I made my promise years ago to stay true to You

I give You thanks even when I’m so low that I don’t see the need to

Sometimes I don’t see the blessing in having this life of mine

Regardless of how I feel I will respect You until the end of time

My purpose is blurry and my will has disappeared

The rebirth after death is an anticipation, life here is becoming too severe

I shine light in the world every time I pick up the phone

But when I need a break there is no one to call on

Lend rides to so call friends and strangers to any block in town

Then I’m out of pocket on gas and maintaining the ride from breaking down

I have turned so many cheeks and humbled myself amongst the proud

Yet the dark shadows of the valley follow me through the crowd

As soon as I try to come up for air and walk upright

I get hit with multiple blows, kicks, scratches and bites

Why do the good suffer so long?

I know that You are a God of many test to make me strong

You created me to praise You, and in return I get the minimum favor

I am no where near ungrateful but I do need more from my Savior!

I try to walk by faith and not by sight

But faith’s eyes are growing weak because life’s darkness is too bright!

Yet I still hold on to the One I cannot see

Is that not worth something? Are you not proud of me?

I try to bless others through my testimony and listen out for Your voice

But it seems like You are starting to whisper and I cannot hear because of the noise...

The noise of dead souls are as loud as ever

All I can do is hope and pray that I’m worthy of the day that I live in Your kingdom forever

I need You to cry out to me as I have done to You

Prove to me that the voice I hear is pure and true

I’m tired of being used and stripped of my happiness and peace

I gain both through You, so help to make the foolishness cease!!!

The time is ticking and I need a way to prove that You can bring me out of this strife

I have been rebuking the enemy as You continue to let him touch me, and everything in my life

Reveal my purpose so that I may finish this race 

I know the people of this World won’t mourn long because the haters cannot take my place

Amen